- You no longer share your daily life, thoughts, or feelings.
- You feel relieved when your partner is not around.
- You stop caring about resolving arguments.
- Conversations stay strictly surface-level.
- Every small disagreement turns into a major fight or silent treatment.
- You avoid talking because you feel unheard or ignored.
- Affection, hugs, and kisses disappear completely.
- You feel no desire for physical closeness.
- The thought of being intimate with your partner feels draining.
- You stop planning future trips, events, or long-term goals together.
- You picture your future life as a single person instead of a couple.
- Your core values no longer align.
The latest study provided by Statistics of the General Council of the Judiciary has revealed that, in 2023, a total of 92,344 marriage dissolution lawsuits were carried out in our country. Despite the fact that divorces, separations and marriage annulments are becoming fewer and fewer, there are hundreds of thousands every year.
At this point, making this decision can be difficult, even traumatic for one of the two parties. At this point, doubts and unanswered questions start to arise: What could I have done wrong? Could it have been avoided? Is it my fault?
However, before you are caught off guard, there are some factors that can make you realise that your relationship is not what it was when you started.
Is the flame of love no more?
One of the first triggers for a relationship to come to an end is the famous ‘flame of love’ that can arise on a first date. Over time, this happens to many couples. ‘It’s not like it used to be. ‘I think I see him/her more as a friend now than as my partner.
Feeling like you are in a relationship with a stranger can be heartbreaking. If you no longer feel an emotional connection with your partner or if physical intimacy has faded, it may be a sign that the bonds between you are breaking down.
Lack of communication
Communication is a backbone of any healthy relationship. It is the means through which we share our thoughts, feelings, desires and concerns with our partner. When this communication begins to fade, it becomes a clear indicator that something is wrong in the relationship.
A lack of communication can manifest itself in a variety of ways. Sometimes conversations become superficial, limited to trivial or everyday topics, such as the weather or what to eat for dinner. Important discussions, those involving fundamental aspects of the relationship or crucial decisions, are avoided or postponed indefinitely.
On the other hand, when important conversations do take place, they tend to end in constant and unconstructive fights. Instead of seeking solutions or compromises, couples can fall into a cycle of blame, criticism and resentment, which further deteriorates the emotional connection between them.
It is important to recognise that communication involves not only talking, but also active and empathetic listening. When one or both partners feel ignored or unheard, the foundation of the relationship is eroded.
Are you no longer happy at his/her side?
Feeling happy and satisfied in a relationship is fundamental to our emotional and mental well-being. When we are constantly sad, feeling anxious or dissatisfied in our relationship, we can already smell that the relationship may be broken.
Constant unhappiness can manifest itself in various ways in a relationship. It can be the result of a lack of emotional connection with our partner, where we feel lonely and disconnected despite being in a relationship. It can also arise when our emotional, physical or psychological needs are not being met within the relationship, leaving us with a deep sense of dissatisfaction.
It is crucial to remember that the responsibility for our happiness does not lie solely with our partner, but that we are also responsible for our own well-being. However, a healthy relationship should be a space where both partners feel supported, valued and loved.
Too many "red flags"
Respect and support are fundamental pillars of a healthy connection, and when these elements are in short supply or disappear altogether, it is a clear sign that the relationship is in trouble.
When one partner in a relationship feels belittled, ridiculed or ignored by their partner, significant damage is done to the very foundation of the relationship. Disrespect can manifest itself in many ways, from sarcastic and derogatory remarks to gestures of disdain or disinterest in the other’s concerns.
If we find ourselves in a relationship where our partner is not there to support us in our times of need, whether emotionally, physically or practically, it can lead to feelings of loneliness, abandonment and insecurity.
Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued, respected and supported. Don’t be afraid to take steps to protect your mental health.
Relationship monotony
As Shakira said in her song: ‘It wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t mine either. It was the monotony’s fault’. And yes, there can come a point in a relationship that feels like it’s straight out of a typical Christmas movie where every day is the same as the last until you find a new love.
When you and your partner no longer have plans together for the future, it can be an indicator that the relationship is losing its momentum and vitality. If you have completely different goals or are not on the same page about what you want to achieve together, it can be difficult to find common ground to build a life together.
They say that one nail pulls out another nail and the best thing to do if you feel the relationship is broken is to set sail to a new port. Discover new horizons and people who can bring back the butterflies of the first date.